Monday, September 22, 2008

One love, One Life, One Dream

Finally free to write something..but I only write if there is something to write..

With Emerge already over, the spirit remains.. the life of a christian is growth.. not only in spirit but in physical self as well.

Exam's over (finally) but I still don't feel the freedom.. are we really free from tests? I can't help feeling that I still have much to do.. but I am not sensitive to what I must do..the mind keeps playing tricks on me..and its getting dangerous when responsibility grows.

one, Taman Negara trip this wednesday.. I thank God for allowing this trip to go on.. though it still seem rough around the edges. We've got a smaller bus for 20 pl but we had to increase the price, unfortunately.. still finding a staff to go with us.. Pray its going to be a good weather so that they can enjoy to the max..

Next.. industrial training.. well.. nuthing much to say.. but I'm still grateful that i was accepted.. now I would be praying hard for leaves on the 18 till the 24th november for ASIA CONFERENCE in SINGAPORE!!! WEEEEEE....!! If accepted..when its accepted..it would be my first trip to another country other than thailand (like 15 years ago??!!--I don't remember what I did there..oh dear..)

Anyways...hopefully I'll enjoy the fun and excitement of movies and bowling today.. I guess all students earns it after weeks of hard work.. Plus.. I still need to go shopping!!!!! shoes! I need sport shoes for the TAMAN NEGARA trip!! and more track suits... (no wonder I feel the pressure...haiz...)

Prayer needs of the time being..
1) my brother-in-law.. cancer ain't a pleasant thing.. and sis..give her strength..
2) auntie lee suan..she's recovering.. hope it ain't contagious
3) Taman negara.. good weather, pleasant trip..cooperative pl
4) industrial training leaves..success of ASIA CONFERENCE with me there..
5) sze hui, florence and yvonne's SPM..straight A's!!
6) friends..bless them as they enjoy their holidays and do their industrial training..

Aims this holiday
1) complete industrial training..haha.. weekly report and final report..
2) weekly reports to raymond..can't forget cell leader leh..
3) email to cell group members...
4) quality time with Amah.. and auntie ong..and little (not that little! ) cuzzins
5) read finish the bible and 2 books
6) read micro book???!!! (reconsidering...should i??)
7) go shopping for new clothes.. old clothes are boring.. new year makeover!!

I trusted him.. though I doubted myself.. He still came through for me.. I'm glad I have Him..Love Ya..~Amen!

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Propose to me O proposal!!

Taman Negara.. its exciting but rather annoyingly troublesome..

Music club Welcoming Dinner.. food again??!! If that is what brings people together..

When you grow older the responsibilities pile up more and more.. hope I don't burst..

Currently ASSin' around with ASSignments
Tests are coming and
Reports are due..

Can't wait for industrial training.. but the trouble is.. where would it be??

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Happy Fathers Day :'(

Its only a trivial matter, and yet the tears can't stop flowing. From what I deduced, I've made some bad decisions these two days.

Yesterday, the talentime committee had a karaoke session. I knew I shouldn't have, but I did go anyway. 12.30 am singing. My throat had that bad feeling and I ignored it. My mind had 2 contradicting voices.. they were either a voice of reason and a voice of temptation.. when I made my decision to go, I didn't feel good. I went for the sake of going. True enough, I didn't exactly enjoy myself at all. Too many people.. It felt like foundation karaoke.. I was choking... It felt nice only for a while.. then the feeling faded away..

Today..is the worst thing ever.. and I can tell you that I only blame no one but myself. I have no Idea what had actually happened to me..not thinking things through before I make a big decision.. There's a fact about me...I don't actually know when to say "no".

I had planned to go back today.. due to the fact that its father's day, i have to take my management book, and attend my church's luncheon..my bro's going to be there.. when raymond who assumed I was going back at night, tried to persuade me to go back after the 5.30 pm church service...

francis called me that friday night to confirm and i asked my mom about it.. my parents said okay.. I found out later they said ok thinking I had already bought the ticket... but my plan was to go there and buy and go back straight away...

I shouldn't have gone to the service anyway...I couldn't pay attention because I was worried I couldn't get a ticket. I was equally excited wit what I planned to do when I do get there.. and then, raymond who promised to send me to pudu at 7.15, came out from the service at 7.30. It was in those 15 minutes I started crying.. I absolutely despise a 'promise' not done... what he said was.. by 7.15 must be out... Now, I'm not mad at miscommunication, I'm dissappointed at the punctuality. From the time I stepped in the car, to the moment I got the call frm mom to cancel the trip ( due to danger), till the time I got home, the tears can't stop streaming down... I can't understand why.

Was it because I plan to pour out all my early semester experience?
was it because I wanted to reduce my dad's calorie intake through the nutrition subject I learned?
was it because I just wanted to see my dear brother back home?
was it because I wanted home-cooked food?
was it bacause I just want to sit with them watching astro together?
was it because I needed my father's nutty jokes?
was it because I just needed to be close to mom and dad?

sometimes, I can't tell, which is part of God's plan and which is just a decision disaster. I'm certainly as devastated as the time I knew I failed my maths test..

My rationality says, "don't dwell on it. It's nothing, only a small matter",
My emotion says, "Stupid!! why didn't you think it through!! you should have made sure everything was clear with everyone!! Look what you've caused.. now you troubled your brother to have to bring your things to you!!".....

Pleasing people is so hard..because It doesn't work both ways...
These are the times, I hate myself for making myself feel bad.. maybe that's why I can't stop crying...

Just going to sleep it off and start doing my work tomorrow. (now's 11 pm)

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Bangau'ing

bangau oh bangau, kenape kau sangat kurus,
'cam mane aku tak kurus, rumput tak 'mau timbul..

kalau tiap-tiap kali bagi alasan, 'cam mane nak buat kerje?
'makin hari 'makin gemuk, makan dan tidur saje...
pot pet pot pet saje.. tengok kartun le, sampai nak muntah darah.
jelak la skrang, malas nak buat ape-ape.
cuti tak panjang, nak cuti lagi la!!
result tak banyak, tak buat kerja la!!
Ape nak jadi ni? makin tak buat, makin nak sesal..
kalau nak buat, makinlah nak tidur.. macam mane ni??!!

Adoi!! betul-betul nak muntah ni!!
entah kenape tiba-tiba buat "blog" dalam bahasa.. syok sendiri kut...

Kuat-kuat jerit seperti orang gila ler!!
AAAAAAaaaaaaaAaaaAAAAAaAAaaAAAAAAaaaaaAaAAAAaAa..........!

(phew, gua sudah siao liao..telima kasi manyak manyak..)